Something lorikitty said in a response to one of my postings really shifted my thinking about how I feel about what happened with TJ. And I was over the hill in Wednesday night, in San Jose Saturday helping my friend move from Morgan Hill to there and I was back over the hill again on Sunday in Fremont. I still like being over there as long as I don't associate everything with sad memories of TJ. So, I'm still thinking about moving over there. I think after a couple of months, I should be able to be over there without any problem. Saturday night was really hard because I usually would have been spending the night at his house instead of driving back to Santa Cruz and then we would have spent Sunday together. But I was fine and not sad all day Sunday. That is really big since the past 2 Sundays I've been really miserable. I still miss him a lot and miss hanging out with him but I'm not so sad anymore.
I think it will still be a while before I can hang out with him again, but at least I'm not so miserable anymore. I still dream about him every morning and wake up from the dream between 3-5am sad and can't go back to sleep for awhile.
I did the weigh in this morning and only lost a pound since last Monday. However, I weighed a pound less than I did today last Wednesday. I worked out a lot over the weekend and ate sushi last night which is a lot of carbs (because of the rice). So, I'm not worried about it. I'm still doing it even harder than before and I'm still noticing huge changes in the way my clothes are fitting.